Dear Grandfather

When you built this wooden house in Aguinaldo Street, did you know?…

…That upon its windowsill your granddaughter would spend hours of her life contemplating the world beyond?

…that as a young girl she would sit here dreaming of highschool crushes and future dreams?

… gaze at stars all nights when the world is asleep and the sky is alight?

…watch the clouds go by like seconds and minutes passing only once and never to return?

…shed tears in secret and dig graveyards in her soul for memories long gone?

…share laughter here with friends that are for keeps?

…that she would grow up one day and witness many things, but the Santol tree outside would always turn brownish-orange with fruit every June, over and over and over again, perhaps even long after she herself has had grandchildren of her own?

Did you know?…

…that one day she will sit here waiting for the one she loved, her heart swimming in an ocean of anxiety and restlessness and hope?

Did you know?…

…that when her heart is broken this windowsill will be your cradling arms while she gathered her courage and tried to be whole again?

Did you know?…

…that when doubt assailed her like a thousand arrowsfrom the sky, your window would be her sheild, offering sanctuary and protection and peace?

I don’t know howmany prayers have I whispered since the first time I sat here.

How many June mornings have I seen the golden brown orbs of sour fruit weigh down the branches of Maninay Sandra’s Santol Tree. Did they watch me too and noticed how i’ve changed every year?

Can that tree ever teach me tolet go of the beautiful burdens from my own branches? Let them fall from my grasp when the time is ripe? Let them becometheir own trees one day?

My memories of you have always been confined to your short visits from Vancouver. But by the handiworkof your house and parts of your labor lovingly laid in this small portion of home, you have built me a keepr of my secrets. A cradle for my tired soul. A home from the complicated mess that is the world.

Did you know?

Or was it just one of those things people do without actually knowing?

Was it just a window because houses simply had them?

Nonetheless.

Though I have no way of telling you now, your window has become a Very Important Window.

At least to one person.

One day, your granddaughter will sit here again in her wedding dress and wave to the Santol Tree like an old friend and feel the cradling arms of the family you have given her, firm and comforting against her back.

I will never know if you knew…

But nonetheless, I thank you.

Deeply.

And lovingly…